Woke up to find it snowing this morning. Its still coming down. I had to rush out and get some cat food this morning as we had run out. Now I've got a cat sleeping on bed and snoring another with back turned towards me. Being on the computer is not popular with them.
I'm trying to work up the energy to do some serious housework which is over due. In the meanwhile read this account of visiting NY.
Jonathan Ross on the radio, cats curled up in the intray. Piles of books, papers, clothes everywhere. Condensation on the window. Dampish Saturday. Waiting for a telephone consult with my herbalist. At one I'm going to pick up my photos from NY - I'm so excited! Called a friend this morning she's off on maternity leave and spent the whole week in bed with a cold, another friend was rushed to hospital for x-ray. Its been a long long winter and almost everyone I know has been ill. I get a cold, get over it and get another. I'm now on horsepills from the doctor, pray they work soon.
I had a job interview yesterday - which I got - now I have a one day a week job starting in April. The plan is to move towards a multiple job situation in the autumn.
Time for breakfast.
Freighter travel - was pleased to come across this article last night as I was discussing this with a friend. Another good alternative to flights site is Seat 61. I'd been thinking of offsetting my flight to NY and had found a company that does it. But does kind of smack of 'buying your way out of the problem'.
The Cloud Appreciation Society - I was most puzzled to get a membership yesterday and badge! Then I got an email from a friend saying she'd given me membership. It looks great, fun and eccentric. I love looking at skies.
I've been off line with a cold/cough. I'm back at work but obviously still tired managed to spill a cup of water over my keyboard this morning. Lots of sopping tissues chucked in the bin.
How to process film using kitchen staples.
Hopefully will have my NY photos processed this weekend.
"In Western culture, artists aren't encouraged to be integral to the social, environmental, or spiritual life of the community. They do not train to engage with real-life problems. Instead they learn to be competitive with their products in the marketplace. All our institutions are defined by this market ideology-none have escaped. "Professional recognition" in the form of brisk sales and positive reviews still remains the primary pattern of thought that structures the internal rhythms of art-making. For a long time now, I have been questioning these premises; anyone who has ever read anything I have written will know that my books are meant as a challenge to our reigning paradigms of economic control and domination. They seek to expose the coercive propaganda of capitalism as a form of spiritual and ecological suicide-and they look at the Big Picture, always with a view to recovering from the estrangements of Western civilization. Instead of art-as-commodity, deprived of any useful social role, I believe that art can help us to participate in what geologian Thomas Berry deems the "great work" of our time: moving from a devastating presence on the planet to a more benign presence".
Suzi Gablik
"I do sympathise with Bush and Blair trying to find WMDs. I'm like that with my scissors. I put them down, then I search all over the house, and I never find them. Of course, I do know that my scissors exist."
10 different things to give up for Lent. I promise to make more effor with the plastic bag thing.
Still jetlagged and tired despite sleeping most of yesterday. Will bore about holiday later. What a threat. Its hailing here in Scotland.
An interesting blog post from 37 days
I have to say that I've made a conscious effort to move my focus on what was bringing me down all last year. There is a certain self punishing tendency that we should be able to cope with things and not have them bring us down to just move away out of the circle.
(this is from Molly Gordon's newsletter go to her website to sign up)
My name is Molly, and I'm recovering from terminal self-sufficiency.
One of my strategies for remaining self-sufficient is to manage my needs, especially my emotional needs. I can go for weeks or even months with a breaking heart and not know it. Believe me, that takes a lot of energy. In fact, I've been living that way for 15 months, and I'm exhausted.
The highlights of my heartbreak are in my blog, but what I want to share here is not the drama but the healing that came about because I finally let my myself feel broken.
I don't know about you, but feeling broken doesn't match my fantasy of success. On top of that, I know I am blessed in so many ways, that I sometimes feel that it would be wrong to feel broken. Between wanting to appear whole and feeling guilty, I fail to notice that feeling broken is not the same as being broken. Grief and fear are not terminal conditions, unless, perhaps, we resist them. "Falling apart" is not the end of the world, it is more likely to be a new beginning.
About six weeks ago some wise colleagues helped me see that I was utterly and completely worn out. As soon as I got it, relief and ease flooded in. When I stop striving to have more energy than I have, to be more evolved than I am, when I stop defining wisdom in terms of my high-flown thinking and listen to my heart, I discover (again) that the cracks I've been trying to hide are the way that Light gets in.
These days I'm taking things simply and easily. I sleep in often; I eat real food, and I'm learning to prepare it before I'm starving. Most of all, I'm not worrying about what I'm not doing right now. It's sort of eerie; the shadow of my preoccupation with "keeping it together" still hovers about me, yet I can no longer pretend that it's necessary. Keep what together? How?
Lately, I've been waking up with a profound sense of well being coupled with immense involuntary gratitude. As one of my wise colleagues said to me, the other half of "Let go" is "Let God."
I get what I am willing to notice that I need. How about you?
Just got an email from the campaign today. Cameo cards have been re-introduced. £25 per year for discounts on all films, free sunday matinees, free previews (I saw Good Night and Good Luck last week). Its an easy way to show your support if you live in Edinburgh.
underwear tick!
hotel tick!
puzzling over maps tick!
notebook (I plan to do lots of writing in NY) tick!
Great website Muse to Muse (via 52 Projects) I do envy the layout.
